Power Over Vs. Power With.

At the basis of all stories of separation exists the false belief that we, as humans and sentient life, are separate. Conditioned from childhood in the “power-over” authority exerted by our parents, our caretakers, our role models and “authority” figures, these systems of power-over have been perpetuated by the “social programming” that are steeped within the hunger games of “emotional commerce.” This separation from the truth of who we are is the source of all suffering.

Power-over communication is the root cause that began the separation from our own sacred hearts, as we gave away our power, totally dependent on “the big people” for our survival, most of us learned to comply, yet inwardly rebelled and created our own separation, which becomes the governing undercurrent that underpins all acts of passive and physical violence.

If you were raised, even punished, by believing that needs are “selfish,” “weak,” or “needy,” you too have likely adopted a “false identity” that dishonored and denied your own sacred heart and needs. Did you outwardly comply, but inwardly rebel against this form of relating? Whether you are two years old or 100, no is a complete sentence, as our no is a yes to us. In an effort to “be loved,” “fit in,” “seek validation,” or “approval,” we began complying outwardly to those in “authority” who exercised “power-over” us, whether than was our parents, our teachers, the “experts,” or “laws,” these insidious forms of violence are the first act of separation.

Integrating The Language of Compassion, a power-with model for connection, you gain ‘innerstanding’ within as you engage the compassionate inner dialogue to see what’s alive and what is the need that is wanting to be heard, while growing your compassionate awareness that all needs matter. This doesn’t mean we are responsible to meet another’s needs. It also doesn’t mean that just because we sense a need, that the need itself isn’t a mask and a direct path of seeing yet a deeper wound. This is where learning to create “the gap” to truly listen to your heart begins to be the direct path to the alchemical surrender of trusting the gift that the mirror of all relationships offer.

Remember, we may be the stimulus of another’s reactions, but we are never the cause.

It is not the conflicting needs that are the cause of relational disconnection, but rather the misguided strategies we have been conditioned to employ that become the source of so much suffering, dissatisfaction, mistrust, unease, and ultimately the devastating impact caused from the inner or outer war of separation, caused when we disconnect from listening and honoring your own heart’s needs. When we honor and contribute to another’s needs not because we “have to,” or think we “should,” but because in desiring to do so we know that life is and can be more wonderful, we build authentic dynamic relationships where trust and connection becomes the foundation of love, beyond circumstance or condition..

As you begin to open your heart to honor “what’s alive within you…” you naturally connect to the gift that our shared needs bring to the tables of empowering authentic connections that make all of life more wonderful for you, and for me.

All emotions are vehicles of your divine consciousness, arising important revelations for your conscious awareness and healing―birthing love’s unity from within, beyond the suffering of duality’s separation.

​