The Ties That Bind Us.

Viewing family relationships within the conditioned false belief system that ties us to unhealthy ways of relating is to deny the truth that all relationships, and the roles we have learned to “play” within our familial relationships, offers us the perfect mirror to witness the expectations and false belief systems that have been passed on for generations.

Breaking these ancient ancestral chains that bind us is precisely why we are here. Self-love is about taking self-responsibility to stop playing out old records perpetuated by our shared core wounds of separation and the conditioned “roles” and false belief systems that create cycles of separation, and suffering.

When one person within a family system “rules” over what we have to do, or be, “to be loved,” “valued,” “seen,” or “accepted,” these energetics of the entire family system is rocked off balance. Genuine and mutually supportive systems of relating is rare in our conditioned inverted fear-based systems of “reward” and “punishment,” that began “with the big people” and “authority” role models telling us the way life, and love, is or is not. One of the most powerful teachings I was given came from Dr. Henry Cloud who shared in a boundaries class I was taking, “When you leave your home you no longer are bound to the parent/child roles.”

These multi-generational roles are all tied to the games of “emotional commerce” and the fear-based conditioning that are responsible for our shared core wounds of separation, until they are not. Self-mastery begins as you examine through self-inquiry the roles you have worn (and worn out) and choose self-honor and self-love to redefine those family relational dynamics to adult-adult relationships as you invite your family to also break these relational patterns responsible for so much pain and suffering.

As we turn inward to honor our needs for healing through self-inquiry and self-love, we can invite those old roles into the light of truth and the table of our relationships to redefine a new relationship to one that agrees to honors mutual care, love, and respect.

It is our core foundational relationship with our parents and siblings where we harbor and have repressed some of our deepest wounds. Therefore, it is these relationships that offer you the rocket fuel accelerator for your deepest healing, and growth. It is within these relationships that have molded the “you” of your identity.

Fundamental to authentic sacred union, conscious parenting, and knowing the alchemic reflection of divine love beyond condition, begins by choosing to break these ancestral wounds and patterns.

It is within self-inquiry that we can witness and trace our life-alienating patterns of emotional withdrawal, rebellion, unhealed core divine masculine and divine feminine woundings and the many ways we have repressed the full relationship within ourselves. It is these limiting beliefs that if not healed become the behaviors that we drag and project into our current relationships which are the source of our suffering and feelings of separation.

Love is only ever present in the freewill to choose what relationships carry a genuine commitment to honor the gift that the mirror of relationship offer us in our journey to liberation, as love embodied.